Last Unit Blog (the rest is up to me!)

Although I feel like I’ve grown in many areas throughout these past 10 weeks, my self assessment doesn’t really show it.  My spirituality scores have stayed the same, but my physical assessment has decreased.  I think it was mainly due to the cold weather, that makes it more difficult for me to incorporate exercise in my daily activities and the construction nearly diminished because we ran out of money for me to continue our bathroom project.  My psychological assessment has stayed basically the same, although with new stressors to tackle.  But then again with me, assessment almost needs to be done on a daily basis because I have good days too!  Especially when I do incorporate contemplative practice into my busy schedule.
I think I’ve done well in progressing towards my goals from a unit 3.  My wrist isn’t sore anymore, so only time will tell if it’s healed; or I can just keep telling myself that it is healed and not worry about it anymore.  I haven’t had any major impulsive outbursts lately, since I have been spending more time reading the bible and praying for God’s guidance.  Lastly, I think I’ve been doing a good job getting rid of the stressors I have control over.  My one roommate is gone, and my husband is finally getting strong enough to realize his baby bro is taking us for granted.  I’ve also made one of the most difficult decisions in my life to accept a new job offer, ridding myself from work stress even though I had stability.
From this course, I’ve learned how to control my conscious mind and allow wisdom to lead my actions.   I am that fun loving, adventurously curious kid I’ve always been.   I’ve gained a higher confidence in myself that I’m doing the right things for the right reasons, still keeping a sense of self-discipline.  I think the most difficult part in continuing my journey is to keep my mind still.  But now I’ll know what I need to do if I see or feel myself falling back.  This experience has helped me to move forward in my life with confidence and has allowed me to have an open ear, a kind humble heart, and words of wisdom to pass on to those in need of wanting help.
Come on guys!  Let’s make this world a better place!

Final Project: Unit 9

      I.        Introduction:
Why is it important for health and wellness professionals to develop psychologically, spiritually and physically? What areas do you need to develop to achieve the goals you have for yourself?

It is our vow to “Enter a personal process of self-development” (Dacher, 2006).  To promote true and full health and healing into the lives of others, we must heal ourselves first.  The only way to heal is through holistic means of embracing all 4 aspects of our human experience: psychospiritual, biological, interpersonal, and worldly.  Only after we have experienced this euphoria of an everlasting and obtainable, fully extendable health, happiness, and wholeness, can we motivate and promote the true meaning of integral health to others.

Personally, I believe, on a surface level, I’ve touched base in all psychological, spiritual, and physical means for self improvement.  Although, I know there is much more to be learned and I yearn for that knowledge; therefore, I move forward and take the necessary steps my heart logically, yet with much faith, leads me to, to follow my dream of an enduring happiness for myself and to share this with others.

    II.        Assessment:
How have you assessed your health in each domain? How do you score your wellness spiritually, physically, and psychologically?

Everything I do, every move I make, I ask for God’s guidance; I live for Him.  Not only do I do this with conscious thought, but I’ve noticed that I sometimes act, without intention (automatically), for that same cause.  I respect all concepts of the living and the dead, the spiritual world, and even the unseen, taken for granted energy forces that dwell directly among us here on earth. With that being said, spiritually, I’m at a pretty high place; giving myself an 8 or 9. 

Physically I’m probably at about a 4.  This winter season has put somewhat of a halt on my exercise through normal daily routines.  So I’m a bit disappointed in myself that I couldn’t reserve a small amount of time on a daily basis to just be able to care for my body’s needs.  This also includes my diet as well.  I think with all my current stress bundled in a small time frame, I just ate whatever was convenient at the time.  I did notice my immune system wasn’t very high, and my energy levels have been shot; I think I even went into somewhat of a winter depression mode as well because I felt as though I didn’t have control over the matter.

Which brings me to: psychologically.  Lately, I confess I’ve been a mess.  I’ve had high stress trying to win over my marriage again yet this time at a higher, more true, relational level and in addition I guess I never realized how hard it was going to be for me to leave my co-workers, in which I’ve been working side by side with for 5 years, as I transition jobs.  I think the work issue has hit me harder because there was a time limit, and I wanted to leave making sure everyone knew how much I appreciated them in my journey through life.  My marriage, I still have time to work on, as long as I have hope.  Through this experience it seems that with my stress levels being so high, it was much harder for me to dedicate my time out for meditation, so psychologically currently I’m at about a 5.

   III.        Goal development:
List at least one goal you have for yourself in each area, Physical, Psychological (mental health) and Spiritual.

My physical goal is obvious: I need to get off my bed and exercise.  I’ve been having a strong urge to want to hit things, so I’m currently in search for a cheap, decent punching bag.  My first session of yoga, was a neat experience.  I didn’t really feel like I was working out though so I wouldn’t consider that really physical exercise, more-so mental exercise.  I’ve been thinking about joining a kickboxing class or even getting my family back into martial arts.  Time is the determining factor in where this decision lays.  I also have to get back into a regular routine of grocery shopping weekly and thinking about my meals ahead of time.  I think with my new job, I work one less day, so I’m hoping this really helps with a lot of my time issues.

Psychologically, I really need to also dedicate time for complete silence.  My mind needs rest!  I need to stop acting upon worried thoughts and emotions and start acting with faith and wisdom.

My spiritual goal is to have more faith in God and to come to accept the fact that my daughter has a special connection with the spiritual world, just as my husband does.  Because I personally can not see, I fear for her because I don’t know what they want.  I just need to keep praying that God will guide her in the right path and give her the strength to stand up for herself.

  IV.        Practices for personal health:
What strategies can you implement to foster growth in each of the following domains; Physical, Psychological, and Spiritual. Provide at least two examples of exercises or practices in each domain. Explain how you will implement each example.

To promote my physical growth, I just need to stay engaged in the activities I enjoy doing: martial arts, which promotes the mind/body/spirit connection, and since springtime is coming up I need to get a new bike, since mine got stolen, and start pedaling down to work, meditating on my music and the environment. 

For my psychological development, I need to start continuing practicing and mastering the art of simply clearing my mind through contemplative practice.  I can alternate between meditation and visualization techniques to refresh my innate senses of loving-kindness and acting with wisdom.

Spiritually, I can stay connected and communicate with people of similar faith and helping my local community; in addition to keeping in regular communication and connection directly to God through prayer and reading the bible.

   V.        Commitment:
How will you assess your progress or lack of progress in the next six months? What strategies can you use to assist in maintaining your long-term practices for health and wellness?

I think I need to stop and reflect on my progress on a weekly basis until everything becomes routine.  If I’ve reached my goals, I’ll continue until my heart tells me otherwise.  Then I’ll re-assess and make appropriate changes to reach my new goal.

I need to keep practicing contemplative practices on a daily regular basis.  I also need to keep moving forward, doing more research and maybe even engage myself and my husband in a retreat of some sort.  Then we can help and encourage each other as we live and grow together, serving the world with the gifts God gave us.

Life's lesson: A life of Hope (unit 8)

First off I want to apologize to all those who have been keeping up with my blogs and possibly silently seeking my guidance and I was no where to be found. I guess I've just recently been caught up in my recent life's adversities of switching jobs, and trying to foster that with my co-workers/(second family) in the nicest possible way so as to not have any hard feelings or even feelings of jealousy. Secondly, as I've said in previous blogs, I feel I owe it to my family first and foremost to help them even acknowledge this possible concept of integral health. With that being said, my significant other is quite indirectly very demanding of my presence and attention; so, I've read many of your posts, although haven't been able to fully respond in the best ways possible. I'm making a heartfelt honest effort in these last two weeks to make up for my somewhat subjective absence over the course of this term. Just thought you all should know, that I honestly, really do care.

Back to school work...

I think the two practices that have been most beneficial for me are the Subtle Mind Practice and this last visualization practice we did on pages 144-146 in our Integral Health book. I feel as though I really already have this massive loving-kindness for humanity itself and my main issue is really my anger and acting on impulse, therefore I feel the Subtle Mind Practice really keeps me focused on intention and helps remind me of who and what I really am inside that I need to exert on the outside as well.

This last visualization exercise reminds me of my final aim and motivates me to show the world that true happiness does exist even in what seems to be an endless hope of life in a cruel world of dishonestly, hate and despair. I just want to help...

It should never be one sided

Seeing as Asclepius is the Greek god of Healing, the wise person I visualized was the ultimate.  In the end, I experienced a more heartfelt acceptance for things being the way they are.  I was calmer and noticed I wasn’t so quick to speak when I conversed with people afterward; rather I tried to gain an understanding of their thoughts yet continued with confidence in my words.

The saying “One cannot lead another where one has not gone himself” is just like the question “How can you help take a splinter out of another’s eye when you have a log in your own?”  You can’t show the correct path to someone else if you don’t fully understand it yourself.  I do believe that one must be obligated to develop and evolve them before tending to their clients or patients; otherwise one might put themselves at a higher level of standard and create a barrier for optimum healing.  The other must feel it too.

To encourage my psychological and spiritual growth, I actually just got back from a community focus meeting from church.  Our aim is to try and reach out to the community next door and show them the light.  I believe that not only will these people be transformed through loving-kindness, but we as a team and ourselves individually will also flourish, learn and grow from this experience as well.

Unit 6: My new starting point

I feel a sense that all human-kind is able to achieve happiness and wholeness and to release themselves from needless suffering; I also inhibit the motivation that I, myself, have the power to guide this human-kind on the path to their inner flourishing.
I've made note that I must help my family first and foremost before I can fully engage myself in the lives of others.  On the other hand, work has been my  #1 distress and I've noticed that I've allowed my work environment to recently begin pulling me back into the physical world of resentment and hate which I bring back home.  I began to start preparing myself for a change in work environment, but realized I was trapped because of a contract I had signed until my braces come off.  And then I read of the story told in the East about the woodcarver, and it all came back to me about why I'm here in this world.  It's not to live in hate, but to live in love and realize that everything has a purpose, I just need to have faith!  I once again embraced the Serenity prayer:

God,
Give me the SERENITY to accept the things I can not change,
the COURAGE to change the things I can,
and the WISDOM to know the difference

So I made a plan to let go of all the things I don't have control over and remembered to have as much fun as I can even in the heat of the stress at work.  I did feel much better...  Ironically, I got a call from my ortho that next day, offering me a position at their office (my only physical outlet option from my current job because the deal I had made was with them.)  Again, patience is definitely a virtue and God does work in mysterious ways - I'm tellin' ya!  This decision does require a bit of contemplating though, because I will be getting a significant pay deduction especially if I want to keep my health benefits.  Although, for what it might be worth (my hope), I see this as an opprotunity knocking on my door for further growth and developement and my heart is strongly urging me to accept it in.  I'll let God handle the rest and we'll see where I end up...

The Art of Loving-Kindness

Looking at the practice of loving-kindness from my very last perspective from my last post, I can honestly say that it is quite beneficial.  A bit difficult in the after effects of playing it out at times, but most definitely recommended, even if just for 5-10 minutes twice a day.

Practicing this revitalized my loving nature; it allowed me to escape from the turmoil of the "real" world to bring back to me the essence of what was really important: to love and to love others.  The difficulty lay when I tried to help someone very important to me, and my help was rejected.  Though from that experience, I've come to terms with the fact that I can only help and advise so much, the rest is really up to that particular individual no matter how close you may feel you are to that person.  From this I've acknowledged that 'patience is truly a virtue' and only time will tell if my words actually initiate a spark.

Mental workouts are in some sense quite similar to meditation.  It requires you to get away from the "outside" and to focus in the moment.  Although, unlike meditation in which you focus on the now in a physical sense, mental workouts require you to visualize your inner strength and abilities; it's at this time when I'm able to "hear" the Lord and physically feel His presence in my heart again.

I understand the concept of practicing this daily.  With cognitive practice, it soon becomes an automatic response.  This has actually been helping me a lot with my stress and anger issues, hence the saying: 'Love conquers all, and love never fails.'

What do I think of myself?

In all honesty, I think self-reflection in it of itself is a bit difficult for me to truthfully admitt.  I think I may have a tendency to evaluate myself a bit higher than it actually may be for two reasons: 1) I don't really feel comfortable making known to others how crazy my mind can be at times, and 2) I think I try to convince myself that things are better than they seem. 

Although, with that being said, seeing as this is actually the first time that I've actually admitted this out loud and apparently in public, I think this is a good 1st step in getting to know my deep, true self and finally healing myself from my past.

Ok, back to school work... A-physical wellbeing: I give myself about maybe a 7 or so because, I actually do like to work out, I just feel I really have no time to dedicate the time of stretching before and after a 30 minute vigorous workout; at the same time, I'm by all means not lazy.  I love hard physical labor such as construction, and I highly encourage a clean house as much as possible, I love playing all sports and being active, I take my girls out ice skating a lot (I do skate with them), I also like to roller blade while they ride bikes to the store, or beach; I even found out that roller blading while trick-or-treating was one of the best ideas I've ever had!  In addition, I ride my bike 5 miles to and from work in the summer when I don't have to pick up my girls from the sitter, just to try and squeeze in some activity in between responsibilities and it also saves a lot on gas as well.

B-spiritual well-being: I'd have to say I could probably rate myself pretty high up there at about a 9 or so.  Ever since God saved me about a year and a half ago, I do my best to try and place all my trust in him.  I've recently noticed that everything I say, relates back to God's higher purpose, and what I say, reflects my actions, even in rough times; Jesus knows as well as the rest of us, life on Earth isn't always peachy keen.  Sometimes the truth hurts, no matter how much concious thought you put into your words, it must be heard anyway, but ONLY if it's for a better purpose or cause...  I can honestly admitt, I'm a very passionate Christian but I give myself a 9 rather than a 10 because there is always room for improvement and there is always more to learn.  Plus, I'm still trying my best to take care of my anger issues of acting on impulse rather than taking a step back and listening for God's communication.  I am much better, but I still need work...

C- my psychological well-being is a real toughy...  I guess I give myself a 5 or 6 or maybe lower, I'm not sure really how to rate that one.  I've always pretty much lived my entire life since the day I was born in a high stress environment, so I think that even if I were to not have so much on my plate, I really wouldn't know what to do with myself.  But it seems like lately, I've really been getting overwhelmed.  Work is demanding much more of us, when I already feel as though I'm giving it my all and I'm really starting to get burned out with the way that the front desk is schedueling our patients; I have my brother-in-law living with us that acts like a 15 year old rather than 20, and another of my husband's childhood friends also staying with us that doesn't know how to watch his language in front of my girls or even respect them when they sleep without me having to tell him to be quiet at least 3-4 times a night; my mom is still suffering from her recent divorce, so I try my best in trying to help her out weekly seeing as she doesn't even know how to change a lightbulb; deciding how to treat my daughter with adhd is really killing me because I don't even want her on medication to begin with, but her teacher exclaims that she won't be able to pass her if she can't focus properly, even after I've been working extremely hard with her trying to keep her with her classmates as far as acedemics are concerned; lastly I actually just got into a real big dispute with my husband to the point where I'm actually at my mom's house right now for the first time in years... So I can say, yes, I'm a bit stressed!

A goal I can try to reach as far as my physical-wellbeing is concerned is to try and reverse my beginning stages of carpel tunnel syndrome.  I can try to do some wrist exercises in the morning and keep my brace on at night at the same time trying to tell my brain to create the appropiate neuropeptides that will actually heal my physical numbness.
Spiritually, I need to take the time to listen more.  I can do this by reserving a small amount of time in prayer with the Lord, so when the time comes that I get heated up, it'll be easier for me to remember to step back and ask for God's help before proceding.
Psychologically, well, that's why I'm at my mom's house right now.  I'm not sure that with me taking this class that I'm starting to evolve further and am trying to bring my husband to the same level I'm at, or what exactly the case may be...  But as long as we can stay in agreement that we won't take the girls away from eachother, and nothing is set in stone...  I have God, and I'm ok.  I just needed to start getting rid of the stressors that I had control over (ie. the two room mates).

The Loving-kindness exercise was a bit strange I thought.  It was easy for me to visualize and feel warm and fuzzy for myself.  But taking in the negative energy of others and showering them with my light, gave me a disturbing visual and feeling as though I was taking over God's role.  But maybe I should look at it as though God is working through me...

the Journey

G'd evening all you out there and reading!
I'm pretty curious to start these practices of Loving Kindness and the Subtle Mind, and to permenently be able to apply them as a result of my inner healing through the Aesclepius techinique.  Since my spiritual wake up call last year, loving kindness has naturally found its way into my nature; although I believe these practices will help me stay on track and allow me to be able to find my way back to serenity when the life of chaos tries to sneak itself upon me.

Steph

INTRODUCTION: Life

My main goal in life is to be ultimately happy and to share this with all those I come in contact with.  I have many theories about living life to the fullest... but none proven, to say the least.  Although, I don't know if that's even something that you can prove... 

My appreciation for my natural surroundings come from experience in "living it up".  I just got back from snowboarding on Friday.  I'm still sore today, but it was all well worth it.  Working as a positive stress reliever, I was able to take it out on the slopes.  Now, I'm not that great, just so you all know, still learning actually, but to be able to focus on just the present, becuase it may mean life or death, and to know that I'm giving 110% and utilizing all my regressed stress energy in a positive fashion, and exercising my body as well, makes me feel good about myself; it revitalizes and rejuvinates me, and I can come home a more loving mom and wife.  Surfing does just the same but with even more gratification for the world God created for us.  There's nothing like feeling the wind blow through your hair and face and physically feeling the higher force of nature carry you across an ocean of magnificance, even if just for only a few moments... it'll literally, take your breath away.

You don't have to be good at doing these things, you just have to know that you gave it your all without worrying about what other people are thinking about you and it's the experience that gives the story to your life.  My girls have a saying, "Try it, try it, you might like it..." so if the opprotunity knocks on your door, don't hesitate to say "yes".  Now, just so you all know, I may be an adrenaline junky, so know your limits as well.  All I know is that it has worked for me so far and my faith and spirituality with God has everything to do with it. 

I'll post blogs here and there when I get inspired and have the time, or I guess if I just want to vent - hey, it can't be good all the time, then it wouldn't be called "life".  All I can recommend is try it out for yourself and see what happens; you really have nothing to lose, but if there's something to gain it'll transform your entire life forever in the best of forms.